Hello Mr Train, how are you today? I am good, better than I’ve been in years. I’ve reached a conclusion today—I’ve got my epiphany. They say after you reach this level of understanding, the world becomes more worthwhile.
I say they mustn’t have reached it yet.
You see, Mr Train, my epiphany came to me while I lay there in a drunken stupor. I don’t know where I was, how I got there, or how I got home again. But there I was, lying hardly conscious somewhere. And it just comes to me.
There is no ‘meaning for life’, there’s no point to any of it. Life doesn’t get better as we get older, and the world’s about to die, taking us all with it. Of course, that’s our fault, but still, why would I want to bring a child into this world? Why would anyone want to?
Why would I want to be in this world? Yes, Mr Train, I’m asking you. You have about 0.42 seconds to answer before I’m going to have to jump in front of you.
No answer? I thought not.
Well, Mr Train, it was nice talking to you, sorry for the mess.
Byebye now.